The worst part about this situation is being called a slut by people who know me, seeing comments on different sites saying “she’s playing the victim” or “she asked for it by sending the pictures”. Had I been smarter at the time, maybe I would have sent those pictures without my face in them, or maybe I wouldn’t have sent them at all. But I can tell you exactly what I was thinking at the time. I thought about how much I trusted him, how much I cared and loved him, and that I was almost certain I would marry him someday. After ten years of knowing someone, why wouldn’t I trust him?
Call me every name in the book. I will be the first to admit that I made a mistake by trusting a disgusting, hideous, betraying monster, but what he did after I hit send…that was all on him. He chose the path he now has to live with. He deserves everything the justice system gives him. He violated me every day for almost two years. He sent people to find me in my own home. He made me fearful every day of my life! I became someone who is now constantly looking over her shoulder and checking her rear view mirror to make sure nobody is following her. His actions changed me completely.
The lesson I learned is that not every person is good and not every person is brought up with the same morals. I’ve learned that I shouldn’t trust everyone, but I also refuse to let this turn me into someone who closes off to the world. I’ve decided to take my negativity and turn it into something positive. I decided to tell my story, regardless of the criticism I may receive, with the hope that I will change one person’s life, and if I can do that then I’ve done my job.
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